The Poetry of a Rapist

Ballad of a Fat Cunt

Tory Cunt

OH MYKEY
YOU CAME AND YOU WERE A BIT THICKY
but we love you anyway,
oh Mykey.

FOXY LADY

Fox Wee

fox pee
you smell
wee wee
wee

Rape

Rape on the Beach

rape on the beach
stronger than bleach
that should bloody teach
you all for being cunts

SCOOTER

Mobility Scooter

mobility scooter
your legs dont work
mobility scooter
you need one
because your legs don't work

Other poems inspired by 'Mobility Scooter':

Electric Wheelchair

electric wheelchair
gets you around
especially if
your feet don't reach the ground

By Rob

Military Spec Scooter

if you combine a mobility scooter
with a miltary spec computer
and set yourself physics goals
you'll understand about black holes
but if it's just your legs area knackered
you'll be spotted as being spackered
and when you scoot around emma's park
she snap your trunding for a lark

By Pootle

Spacker-Scooter

You should be on a spacker-scooter
but they used surgeons and computers
now everything's slow motion
when you run beside the ocean
Six million dollar man
I am a fan.

By goat

Wank Wank Wank

Wank

wank wank toilet wank
the toilet
wank

MUNGO

Almighty Cunt

there was someone on the internet
who i did not know
they said hello you cunts
with an almighty bellow

i had a little trouble
with any interest i might show
because someone off the internet
is someone i don't know.

Fred West

Fred West
Murdered people
When I was little
So I don't remember
much about him
Other than that they
Knocked down his house
Which was mid-terrace
I think it was up north

Pie

pie, a pie, encrusted in pastry, a pie, it's meat within enthrals me, but if it's liver or something i don't like then fuck it, pie pie, i love pie, most pie anyway, i'm not so fond of fruit pies though, but most pie pie pie pie

Sleep.

SLEEP

Sleep.
Sleep is in many ways
a lot like sex
The more you think about it
The less you gets

Tesco and assorted things.

TESCO

I spacked in Tesco
Over tooth products
It made my legsgo
Utterly buggered

FEMKE

Femke
Massive tits
Gaping slit
Got the shits
I fancy her

THE INTERNET

The internet is great
It's full of weird porn
And blogs that are awesome
And people who are retards
And moan about
Everything
Because they're gay.

GOLF

Golf
Today they found who they were
paired with for the Ryder
But I don't actually care
Because I don't like golf.

I NEED A FLATMATE.

I'M A BIT SKINT

But not so skint
That I can't afford
Beer

I'm a bit short
But not like that
I'm actually
Tall.

I'm running low
on funds
But I can still afford
Buns

Clissold Park

Park park, Spastics bark, Party in the park, spastics bark, Park park, park park park, Party party party spastic park. Park.